Blog Categories

Amusing obituary

Saw this today and loved it – will give you a chuckle on hump day

Funny Obituary

Obituary of William Ziegler

He assures us he is gone

William Ziegler escaped this mortal realm on Friday, July 29, 2016 at the age of 69.
We think he did it on purpose to avoid having to make a decision in the pending presidential election.

He leaves behind four children, five grandchildren, and the potted meat industry, for which he was an unofficial spokesman until dietary restrictions forced him to eat real food.

William volunteered for service in the United States Navy at the ripe old age of 17 and immediately realized he didn’t much enjoy being bossed around. He only stuck it out for one war.

Before his discharge, however, the government exchanged numerous ribbons and medals for various honorable acts.

Upon his return to the City of New Orleans in 1971, thinking it best to keep an eye on him, government officials hired William as a fireman.

After twenty-five years, he suddenly realized that running away from burning buildings made more sense than running toward them. He promptly retired.

Looking back, William stated that there was no better group of morons and mental patients than those he had the privilege of serving with (except Bob, he never liked you, Bob).

Following his wishes, there will not be a service, but wellwishers are encouraged to write a note of farewell on a Schaefer Light beer can and drink it in his honor.

He was never one for sentiment or religiosity, but he wanted you to know that if he owes you a beer, and if you can find him in Heaven, he will gladly allow you to buy him another.

He can likely be found forwarding tasteless internet jokes (check your spam folder, but don’t open these at work). Expect to find an alcoholic dog named Judge passed out at his feet. Unlike previous times, this is not a ploy to avoid creditors or old girlfriends. He assures us that he is gone. He will be greatly missed.

Fun review of reality TV Show

As some of you know, the founder of FOCM, enjoys reality (or as I refer to it: train wreck) TV shows.  I have some limits – like I no longer watch Survivor or Big Brother – but boy do I love me some Bachelor/Bachelorette drama!  I enjoyed E Online’s review of last night’s show.

On a side note, I think Carly is awesomely funny, her comments and laughter are a highlight each week.

Bachelor in Paradise Review – E Online

First Impressions Matter

First impressions really matter.  I saw this article on-line from a Harvard Business Professor and her focus on first impressions.

Harvard Business School professor Amy Cuddy has been studying first impressions alongside fellow psychologists Susan Fiske and Peter Glick for more than 15 years, and has discovered patterns in these interactions.

In her new book, “Presence,” Cuddy says that people quickly answer two questions when they first meet you:

Can I trust this person?
Can I respect this person?

Psychologists refer to these dimensions as warmth and competence, respectively, and ideally you want to be perceived as having both.

Interestingly, Cuddy says that most people, especially in a professional context, believe that competence is the more important factor. After all, they want to prove that they are smart and talented enough to handle your business.

But in fact, warmth, or trustworthiness, is the most important factor in how people evaluate you.

“From an evolutionary perspective,” Cuddy says, “it is more crucial to our survival to know whether a person deserves our trust.”

It makes sense when you consider that in cavemen days it was more important to figure out if your fellow man was going to kill you and steal all your possessions than if he was competent enough to build a good fire.
First 2 things noticed when meeting someone new

FOCM Members Discount Offer

A long time friend of mine, Michael Williams has joined Thrive 4-7.  Thrive 4-7 has developed a mobile phone app useful for tracking and managing mild depression, anxiety and stress.  The app is called Mevii and it was launched on Facebook and is available in the app stores for iPhones and Android

FOCM members are eligible for a Friends and Family Code Here is the link: Free Trial Mevii App

It’s a 7 day free trial after which it is available at a 20% discount for $7.99.  The Friends and Family Code expires August 31.  You can click the link, sign up, provide payment information, and you will not get charged until after the 7 day free trial ends. At the end of the 7 day free trail you can do nothing and become a regular subscriber at $7.99/month or you can opt out/unsubscribe on day 7.

Feedback on your experience is appreciated and can be done via commenting here or emailing Michael at Michael.Williams@thrive47.com

Project and Program Manager Job Openings

Alcami is looking to fill project manager (all levels) and program manager positions across all their office locations.   Alcami provides services for all phases of pharmaceutical development for small and large molecules through two laboratories located in Durham and Wilmington, North Carolina, as well as Germantown, WI, St. Louis, MO, Edison, NJ, Charleston, SC and Weert, Netherlands.

Go to the link below for more information and to apply.  I can provide job descriptions, write to me at chris@focmnetworking.com if you would like to get them.

Alcami Job Openings

Alligators – their time has come

Alligators – do we really need them any more? Thousands of other species have become extinct, can’t we finish off the alligators and crocodiles? They’re a remnant from prehistoric times.

Alligators flat out KILL people.  Guns don’t kill people, loaded guns shot at people kill people.

Where is the outrage?  Can’t we control this somehow?  Make alligators get a background check and wait 3 days before attacking a human.  Let’s ban assault alligators!

Humorous things I’ve seen

Saw these in the April 2016 Reader’s Digest:

People are less quick to applaud you as you grow older.  Life starts out with everyone clapping when you take a poo and goes downhill from there.
– Sloane Crosley; writer, from her book “I Was Told There’d be Cake”

Children’s answers to test questions as seen in the book F in Exams: Complete Failure Edition by Richard Benson.

Q: Use the word congenial in a sentence.
A: When you leave the gravy out too long, it congenials.

Q: The first thing Queen Elizabeth II did upon ascending the throne was to…
A: Sit down.

Q: Write a sentence containing a double negative.
A: Mike is ugly and he smells.

Q: Name two plays by Shakespeare.
A: Romeo and Juliet

Q: On what grounds was Aaron Burr tried for treason?
A: New York

Q: Write about the importance of  animals in Of Mice and Men.
A: The mice are very important – without them, you’d have only the men.

Q: Use the word doldrums in a sentence.
A: I cannot play the doldrums.

 

How FOCM Can Help

A colleague of mine working for a service provider in the clinical research industry approached me to see if I could help them ensure an audience for a promotional and educational event they were hosting in the Raleigh area.  This is a perfect example of using my network and passion for connecting people to good use.

By being an active networker, I have also met people similar to me.  So in the above case I reached out to one of them, also in the industry as well as reached out via email to people I thought would be interested in attending.  I also did a reminder email the day of the event.

As is well known in the advertising and promotion world, sometimes it’s hard to pin down which communication inspired people to respond.  The host of the event may have emailed some of the same people as I did.

I did a count and of the 30 attendees, 9 were people I had reached out to.

I am working on a business model for such a service.  What would you be willing to pay for such a service?