What to do and not do when a moth gets in your ear.

Submitted and experienced by FOCM member Denee Oakley

1. Don’t scream when it rams into your ear. It hurts your friend’s ear as you are on the telephone with her, and it scares the moth so it flitters around in your head.
2. Don’t let a loved one put a flashlight up to your ear. Moths apparently aren’t attracted to flashlights and don’t come flying out of your ear. Plus they get so far jammed down in your ear that you can’t see them with a flashlight anyway. They get scared and flitter around in your ear when the light shines in. You jump because of the flittering (and the disgusting fact that you have a bug in your ear) and they flitter more…..and it echoes in your head too.
3. By this time, don’t start panicking and thinking that not only is it lodged in your ear never to come out, it is probably scared to death so it’s pooping in your ear.
4. Finally, thought pops into head…..my best friend has a friend that had this happen to, except it was a cockroach. Let’s call her.
5. She retells the story of what happened to her friend (who ended up having to go the ER). Great. She is telling me steps to take as she is hysterically laughing at the current situation and saying “Oh my god, I have to tell my husband”.
6. Meanwhile, my husband is on the internet googling “how to get bug out of ear” with keys in hand to go to ER. Moth is still flittering around in head. Each noise made, aggravates it and it flitters more, feeling like it is getting deeper and deeper into the ear canal and probably pooping since it is scared to death.
7. Answer: a few pieces of grass. You shove a few pieces of grass in your ear, the moth grabs hold to it and flies out of ear.
8. The next day you will still have the nightmare of bug in ear….still feel it flittering, even though it is gone….still be afraid there is poop in there.